"I am not a number, I'm a free man," bellowed the Prisoner. Greedy sod, he should have been grateful, because Coventry City striker Paul Williams is remembered in the tomes of football folly by just a solitary letter. Yes, one blessed letter.

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DOUBLE TROUBLE FOR DOUBLE AGENTS...
SATURDAY 31st MAY 2008
There aren't many months of the year when I wouldn't want to be a footy agent, but this is definitely one of them...
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LONG LIVE JOHNNY FOREIGNER...
FRIDAY 30th MAY 2008
So on the opening of the Premiership season back in 92/93, there were only ten non-British players that appeared in their side's starting line-ups...
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ALLEZ LES GERMANS!
THURSDAY 29th MAY 2008
A recent poll suggests that most England fans will be supporting Italy, Spain and France this summer...
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LET THE DARTS DO THE TALKING, PHIL... WEDNESDAY 28th MAY 2008
Interesting United Nations speech by Phil Taylor at the weekend after he clinched the Premier League Darts title...
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ARE YOU SURE THAT WAS ONLY 10 MONTHS? TUESDAY 27th MAY 2008
It really is over, folks. Finished. Fini. Done. End of. Rochdale v Stockport - a fitting finale to a pretty entertaining season...
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FUN-DAMENTAL FLAW IN SCOTTISH GAME... FRIDAY 23rd MAY 2008
Spare a thought for Hearts forward Calum Elliot. The poor petal has declared that "football just isn't fun anymore" and wants out from Tynecastle...
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LIVERPOOL SUPERSTORE STILL A FEW
ITEMS SHORT...
THURSDAY 22nd MAY 2008
Fashion visionary George Davies has arrived back in Liverpool as he oversees the launch of the Liverpool Superstore...
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BOOKIES ECHO CONSUMER CONFIDENCE...
WEDNESDAY 21st MAY 2008

Now I know I keep banging on about this, but it's the day of the Champions League Final, so hear me out...
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FOOTY GODS MARK A FITTING FAREWELL...
TUESDAY 20th MAY 2008

Football's higher powers shine a light on Gretna FC...

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REALITY DAWNS AS FOOTBALL PACKS UP...
MONDAY 19th MAY 2008

It's Monday, I'm frantically scouring the listings and there's nothing there goddamit. What the hell am I supposed to do with my life?
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CUP FEVER SAFELY QUELLED...
SUNDAY 18th MAY 2008

Well thank God that's over with for another year...

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ENGLAND'S FAILURE BLAMED ON
GRANNY SMITH...
SATURDAY 17th MAY 2008
The FA have come to a conclusion over England's stunning failure to quality for Euro 2008.
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PINNING IT ON THE PORN...
FRIDAY 16th MAY 2008
Why should a penchant for miniscule, almost weightless bits of metal afflict the sensibilities of otherwise rational football supporters?
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IT'S SILVERWARE SEASON...
THURSDAY 15th MAY 2008
Research by home security firm Alert-Me suggests that the number of burglaries that take place during major football events sky-rocket...
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FANTASY FOOTBALL COMES HOME...
WEDNESDAY 14th MAY 2008
Has anyone else noticed the play-offs' inherent ability to turn seemingly rational human beings and events into fully-formed fictional entities?
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DIRTY CASH I NEED YOU OH-OH...
TUESDAY 13th MAY 2008
Roman Abramovich didn’t get to where he is today without being careless with his mon...oh...
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THE REFEREE'S A...
MONDAY 12th MAY 2008
You can count the number of times you’ve been to a game and NOT blamed the referee for something on one finger...
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THE INCREDIBLE HULL (SEE WHAT WE
DID THERE?)
SUNDAY 11th MAY 2008
Forget Wigan’s JJB Stadium, the big game today is at Watford’s Vicarage Road where Aidy Boothroyd’s long-ball specialists take on Hull...
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HEY, WHAT ARE THE GERMANS UP TO?
SATURDAY 10th MAY 2008
The German Bundesliga has already packed it’s Lederhosen in preparation for Euro 2008....
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FALLEN GIANTS AT THE FOOT OF LIGUE 1...
FRIDAY 9th MAY 2008
Lyon Schmyon…the excitement in Ligue 1 this year isn’t at the top of the table, its at the bottom...

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THE SHIRT OFF YER BACK...
THURSDAY 8th MAY 2008
Its that time of year when clubs proudly trot out their latest deep mesh, laser-accurate, 20/20 vision footy shirts...
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SMALLTOWN BOYS ON THE VERGE...
WEDNESDAY 7th MAY 2008
It's the biggest night in Arbroath since the Communards launched their 1998 comeback tour at the Town Hall...
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BBC FLAUNT WATERSHED IN PORN FILTH... TUESDAY 6th MAY 2008
You can't expect the folk of this country to be able to digest a load of sweaty lasses running around in tight shorts at such an hour of the day...
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IN THE SUMMERTIME, YOU'VE GOT FOOTBALL ON YOUR MIND... MONDAY 5th MAY 2008
The season is over. This means a number of things-not least the stark void of Saturday afternoons...
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FOOTBALL COMES HOME...
SUNDAY 4th MAY 2008
I saw something happen yesterday that recharged my aching football heart with all that is good about the game...
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SAVE SVEN - HIS LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT...
SATURDAY 3rd MAY 2008
The Blue half are at it again as the Manchester Evening News, launches their 'Save Sven' campaign...

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VORDERMAN AT THE READY...
FRIDAY 2nd MAY 2008
Man Utd vs. West Ham could finally see us all reaching for that remote control...
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ALL ABOARD THE DIRTY DANCING EXPRESS...
THURSDAY 1st MAY 2008
Has Didier Drogba been watching the Thomas The Tank Engine back catalogue?
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