"I am not a number, I'm a free man," bellowed the Prisoner. Greedy sod, he should have been grateful, because Coventry City striker Paul Williams is remembered in the tomes of football folly by just a solitary letter. Yes, one blessed letter.

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RAMS SAVED FROM RELEGATION...
TUESDAY 8th APRIL 2008

I have it on good advice that Derby County are set to be granted a dramatic reprieve from relegation in light of evidence that the leading lights at the top of the Championship have made a pact that they just can't be arsed to win promotion.

I mean, this division is surely the most incredible we have seen (and before you ask, yes, I am even drawing comparison with that unforgettable 1998/99 Dr Martens Premier Division season).


With many teams having only four games remaining, West Brom are favourites, yet they're 5th, (though will leap like a salmon into top spot if they win tonight at Blackpool.)

Bristol City have a racked up a spectacular goal difference of 0, and have scored less goals than Colchester - who are bottom - winning only one of their last seven. And yet they're top of the pops.

Then you've got 2nd-placed Stoke (one win in eight) who flunked their lines last night at home to Palace; and Watford, one win in nine, who are 4th, so it's little wonder the fashionable Hull City have snuck onto the Premier League windowledge, yet most of their fire-power comes from Dean Windass, who is 49 next week.

Then there's Cup semi-finalists Barnsley, who have beaten Chelsea and Liverpool this season, but find themselves in the relegation zone.

And don't even get me started on Cardiff City potentially winning the FA Cup, or QPR being the richest club in the world.

Who needs the Champions League when you've got the Championship?


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