|
"I
am not a number, I'm a free man," bellowed the
Prisoner. Greedy sod, he should have been grateful,
because Coventry City striker Paul Williams is remembered
in the tomes of football folly by just a solitary letter.
Yes, one blessed letter.
READ MORE...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
|
LIGHT
RELIEF FROM LUPINS AND LILLIES...
TUESDAY
3rd JUNE 2008 |
 |
|
|
I
got dragged to the garden centre at the
weekend. Now this is something I would often
shy away from admitting in public, but for
the sake of all bored blokes out there fearing
a summer of slovenly slogs around shops
and out-of-town attractions, I feel I should
reveal one of the most enlightening experiences
of my life.
Did I find God? No.
Did I find some a batch of richly colourful
fuchsias? Well, yes, but that's not the
point.
|
|
What I ultimately
found was a mentally deep and elaborate
time-consuming mechanism that promises
to make mind-numbing afternoons out with
the missus fly past at lightning speed.
Not only that, but the intense banalty
of a trip to Bluewater will come and go
with you barely realising it.
What am I suggesting? Ketamine?
Not right now. Instead, it's the great
football name game.
Oh yes, to the average Joe this might
seem like kiddies' fodder, but trust me,
it works for adults too.
Take my sojourn around one of West London's
biggest garden centres on Sunday. I discovered
football on a whole new mental tangent.
A Premier League all-star line-up sat
there in front of me, amongst the shrubs
and the garden furniture display ..
Robert Green(house)
Steve Potts
Tim Flowers
Ronny (Rose)nthal
(Chris Brass)
Octagonal Sundial
Wheel(barrow
FC)
Edging (Alan)
Shear(er)
The list goes on.
I can safely say I now feel totally differently
about Wyevale Garden Centres. Next week
I've even volunteered to take her to Hampton
Court (Crystal)
Palace. She
can even bring along the mother-in-(Denis)Law
for all I care.
<<back
to diary home
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
| |
|
SUBSCRIBE
TO THE OPEN GOAL DIARY & NEWSLETTER
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
 |
