Back to this weekend .. a pretty dull Cup Final. Done. The season's over in Spain so not a lot to watch there, but I mused over that anyway; while Setanta polished off a season taking film crews to various corners of the football wilderness by screening the Exeter v Cambridge Conference play-off final. Watched.

And now it's Monday. I'm frantically scouring the listings and there's nothing there goddamit. I'm even considering watching some Scottish football this week FFS.

Even news-wise it's as barren as a loveless period I had between April and June 2002 when I developed a large pulsating boil on my forehead. Crawley Town have a press conference this morning that I'm actually considering attending, while I've already been on the blower this morning attempting to get under the surface of Leigh RMI's plans to go full-time next season.

Is this what the next few months are going to be like? What the hell am I supposed to do with my life? Stare at pictures of Harry Redknapp all day, as the BBC website would seem to recommend? Pretend a Spanish accent down the pub when the Euros are on? For Christ's sake I may as well just accept defeat and start watching cricket ..