But following his crushing of James Wade, the checkout king started out a bizarre rant about uniting people in the name of sport, dedicating his win to the Potteries, and calling upon 'his people' to come together, be they Stoke or Port Vale, in a unison of English sport .. (I am assuming his plan involves some elaborate and depraved shirt-swapping orgy, or some fetish-driven scarf exchange conducted in dimly-lit car parks and alleyways somewhere on the city's outskirts.

The speech and subsequent dedication, in itself, was a nice touch, though a whisper from the eaves quickly reminded the chubby champ that he was standing on a stage in the Cardiff International Arena, surrounded by a bevy of passionate Welshmen.

It was at this point that Taylor started to realise his oratorial efforts had the potential to enter the realms of some unhealthy lengthiness, as he toured around the houses and others prefabricated assortments of political correctness, praising Cardiff City, Joe Calzaghe and assorted others.

Indeed, at one point, having already started banging on about Ronnie O'Sullivan, I had money on Terry Griffiths getting a mention.