"I am not a number, I'm a free man," bellowed the Prisoner. Greedy sod, he should have been grateful, because Coventry City striker Paul Williams is remembered in the tomes of football folly by just a solitary letter. Yes, one blessed letter.

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PEDANT REF HIDES DARKER SECRET IN PENALTY FARCE SHOCKER...
SATURDAY 5th APRIL 2008
This ref has cracked. For years his missus has been on the nag juice about his failure to dust the skirting boards, or empty the water out of the iron when he's finished with it. This is the frightening result: a man teetering on the edge, with a hole in his flip-flop."